A UU Parent's Response to the Attack on the Capitol
The scenes of the rioters breaching and vandalizing the U.S. Capitol Wednesday were jarring. Now that we've had a few days to process the event, how can parents reflect on what happened with their children and respond as a UU?
Emphasize our First Principle, the inherent worth and dignity of all people. Children in elementary school and older will notice the difference between the response to the predominantly white MAGA rioters and the Black Lives Matter protesters from the summer. This offers you the opportunity to discuss how racism underpins much of the actions of the rioters. You can ask children why they thought law enforcement treated the groups differently.
This can also be a chance for older children and teens to get involved in letter writing or volunteering with a social justice movement. Even teens under 18 can contact their elected officials.
Our 5th UU Principle stresses the importance of the democratic process. No matter their age, tell your children that when they are older, voting will be very important to keep those who lean towards fascism out of public office (in the meantime, take them with you when you vote.)
Tell them to always work hard to make sure all votes count. Even very young children understand that it is unfair to bar people from voting by closing polling places, limiting hours people can vote and arranging districts so most votes come from certain populations.
Again, stress fairness and the 2nd UU Principle, justice, equity and compassion in our relationships. This is the perfect time to talk about not being accepting disappointment. For instance in sports, not everyone can win. You are supposed to congratulate your opponent, no matter the outcome. As difficult as it is, it's essential to learn how to lose without becoming rude or even violent.
Dr. Deborah Gilboa, a parenting and resiliency expert states that this is a great time to start talking about how people's words can influence others. Yes, people are responsible for their own actions, yet what we do and say affects others. Gilboa writes, “Here’s a way to have that conversation about responsibility for ideas leading to action. If you tell your brother, ‘It would be so cool if we put those fireworks on the stove and turned on the gas,’ but you don’t do it. You just mention it. Do you have culpability? Are you accountable for that? … Most parents would say ‘Yes.’”
Events are still unfolding and this can be a frightening time for adults and children alike. Please reach out to Rev. Lora at pastoralcare@horizonuu.org if you would like to talk more about your reaction to recent events. If you would like more information about talking to children and teens, email Lauren at DLRE@horizonuu.org or join our Parent Group which meets each first and third Wednesday online at 8pm.